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Uncovering the Dissatisfied Self


The Quest for Power and The Need to Attain

The part of us we wish to hide most is our dissatisfied Self. This is true for a variety of reasons. The "need" for approval dictates that we be approving. The need for love dictates that we be loving. We wish we weren't dissatisfied, but we are. And it's our dissatisfaction (coupled with love) that motivates us to "attain" satisfaction. This is the genuine pursuit of happiness that our constitution guarantees us.

Dictated to by our needs, we believe that there is no place for complaint, so in our made-up minds our dissatisfaction becomes unwanted and therefore disowned, alienated, reproved and often vilified and religiously stigmatized as shaytan, or the promptings of the devil. We then manifest as disapproving and reproachful of others, and cover it up with false and hypocritical behavior. We're convinced from our childhood that complaint will gain us only a selfish and hurtful personal satisfaction but alienate everyone else, who will then deny us our needs.

I can no longer hide or bury my dissatisfaction, least of all from myself. I want it my way and I know I want it my way. Call it selfish if you will, but it might be your way too, cause you want "it" your way also. You're just hoping that by following someone else's way it will lead you to getting your way (through the acquisition of some mystical or spiritual "power"), or it will be your way. And how is getting our way necessarily out of sync with the way of the God of Mercy and Forgiveness? I don't see it.

Yet it's in the true self that the secret is found. And where is the true self if not buried under a ton of complaint? The true self is surrounded by its complaint about not being heard, and it's this complaint that people do not want to hear. But they should and must because its their own.

Is This a 'New" Sufism?

So Tasawwuf (Sufism) is the process of uncovering the truth, not the process of seeking it. We seek knowledge until we find what we are looking for - and that is perfect self-expression, perfect self-manifestation. The whole world is a self manifestation and it exists for that very purpose.

We each need to be able to manifest in our own way. Free, loving cooperating individuals, in communion with self as communion with God.