FREEDOM FROM FREEDOM - Are We Really Ready for it,
or will we not accept it until we've discovered it on our own,
and worked our way through our problems with it.
THE PRIMARY MISSION THEORY - How to Earn your Freedom
The point is to become freely involved, as opposed to compulsively enmeshed. And what is it that we are "compulsively enmeshed" in? I suggest that it's our own struggle for freedom!
Liberation is our natural state, but are we really free until we have freed ourselves?
It is the freedom from compulsion and entanglement that we seek. Freedom means "disentangled", "individuated", "separated". We are born into entanglement we are born to heal. But we must seek our own liberation and understand the process before we can see the way to heal others, especially our parents.
Freedom is our lost birthright, the search and struggle for which becomes our conscious or sub-conscious goal. Problem is that we are so much concerned with identifying and obtaining it or, once that's done, defending and maintaining it that we rarely actually get to the point of using it for its intended purpose, our own personal benefit. And in this manner our constructive and conscious involvement in our own lives is diverted or obfuscated. Once our precious freedom is felt or obtained, our time is then spent mostly in defense of it. So we're not really free from it.
Real freedom is the end of the struggle. What we really need is the freedom from "freedom as a goal or object in life to be obtained and protected". This is known in Sufi terms as the annihilation of annihilation, or in Buddhist terms, the end of suffering, or in Sanskrit/Yoga terms, the "liberty" of liberation. Without this "freedom from freedom", or exercisable liberty, we are not really free, or at liberty, to use our selves and our freedom for constructive purposes, the construction of a life of our choosing, for example.
In Sufism, baqa` is our establishment in God realization, but even that, since it is our reality, is not "The Goal", but realization of it is an end to the impeded, unrealized self (nafs) as an object of attention and clarification and the beginning of a "New Work in a New World", that of manifesting, or bringing into being what Al-llah! (God) wills. Shaykh `Abdul Qadir Gilani established that there was a 'goal' after all of the "Goals" attributed to the previous masters of the path and he called it "Liqa`", or the Return (with and to the new life life) with the true vision - the "building of your castle in the kingdom of heaven" that `Isa (Jesus) spoke of. And he did exactly that - built for himself a castle in the kingdom of heaven by spreading the teaching of the real Islam into the hearts of the world for all time and in all the successive generations of Muslims.
But, it must be noted, that even then, the state of "Islam" had degenerated to such a degree that Allah had to bring into it such a man, and the lack of this knowledge was not the intent of the original message. So one has to wonder, what happened to the real Islam that its reality could be so lost that a man of such immense comparative stature had to be "built" so to speak, in order to reestablish such a simple concept?
And this life building is different on a personal level for everyone, because it's our own personal secret. For some it might be the establishment of a new church or religion, for others it might be building a house and having a family. But on a community level its the same - to build and contribute to a community that build and contribute to the individuals.
The Use of Liberty
But the whole point of freedom is to be free to become freely involved, as opposed to compulsively enmeshed. So are we freely involved? And if so, what are we freely involved with? The point of freedom is to "be" free, and the purpose of that freedom is that we can dream and build, and be doing it not out of compulsion, but from freedom. The freedom from compulsion is our most innate compulsion, and becomes our first primary objective. Whether we know it or not, we will always struggle to be free.
The freedom to be freely involved is no small matter. So many of us believe without question that we are free when it is not the case at all. Unless one has tasted the fires of the struggle for spiritual liberation and can document the path to it and remember the battles fought and won, there is no real claim to spiritual freedom. One of the benefits of it is the ability and desire to help others discover it.
However, self realization is only the beginning of the work. It's the goal of the first phase of the healing work, that of self discovery, individuation, clarification and disentanglement from karmic circumstance.
Spiritual liberation is the middle. It's our natural autonomous state. It's the "defended" position in which we "know" ourselves to be free and autonomous individuals but are quite busy defending or asserting it and declaring it to others in the attempt to "keep" it or to "abide" in it. We still don't really know what to do with it and are still always consciously and secretly looking for direction. It's the "seek and ye shall find" phase. "Found my Self, but looking for something to do with it, besides helping others to find it."
And the liberation from liberation is the end of the struggle and the engagement of constructive involvement in one's own personal life.
So how do we get there and what does it look like? And involved in what, we might well ask? Well, that is really the question, isn't it? Isn't that the goal of vision questing and dreamwalkers, to have a true and clear vision of your future as you'd like to see it? But first we've got to get to clarity, right? So that's why we do the prerequisite work of self liberation, otherwise our vision will still be from compulsion.
So have we lost sight of the dream in all the battles for the liberation from which to pursue it? We may have lost sight of it but we haven't lost it. After all, the struggle was for it's preservation, no? So what do we do to recreate it again? Do we sit down and figure out what to do with our lives? That puts us right back where we started.
First, we must realize that we do not have to dream. A dream is not compulsion, it is inspiration. And then realize that we are always inspired, and do not have to act upon a dream. The state of non-compulsion is what I like to call "Loving Limbo". The intermediate state between compulsion and inspiration is "the void". It is the total and sometimes frightening darkness of nothingness and ignorance that we perceive to be all around us and which keeps us locked and moving in the world of fear and compulsion. Until we are totally at home in limbo, the true vision of the light of guidance may not appear.
This is where sitting with your dissatisfaction comes in. It is in effect conscious patience, but more constructive since it it our dissatisfaction that is our prayer for satisfaction. Our dissatisfaction, quiet and felt, is the magnet that will draw to it what it wants, even if we are not consciously aware of what it wants. It Will find it. Our needs are always drawn to us. We do not need to envision them or even "know" what we need. In fact, it is the "knowledge" that gets us entangled in the acquiring of the "known", or what we "think" we no to be the answer or the solution to our "problem'. Our minds love to "diagnose". As a requisite to fixing we must have something to fix. Our yearning is what draws to it what it yearns for. The honesty of our dissatisfaction is all that is necessary to attract the satisfaction. The satisfaction seeks us out from the compassion. We need only to be patient with our dissatisfaction and it will be satisfied/healed. But, if we try to speed up the process by thinking of ways to get out of it, it will resist the fixing of the mind and lead to great frustration.