The Quest for Power
If you are still on the path of quest for power you have not truly tasted the love of surrender.
If you are not sharing the taste with the tasters, you are still in the belief that you can hide yourself for shame of your sin. That is not the way to heal it. Healing is done by keeping a certain kind of company with the Gnostics.
One of the dangers of authoritarianism as a belief is that it leads one on the quest for power in spite of the fact of denial.
Don't be fooled by authority. You will always see what you want.
Even and especially the quest for power to do good corrupts. For what other excuse would we use as a reason to seek or desire power? The need to do good is still a compulsion.
The quest for power, however deep and hidden, is still a sign of not having found it, of ignorance of God.
If one denies one's quest for power or seeks to justify it in any way, one is still in ignorance.
What you are looking for is not where you're looking. Otherwise you would not be still looking.
The quest for power indicate the presence of fear and hatred in the heart. Even if fear and hatred are justified, they are still in the heart, and that heart is still wounded, not healed, and is not yet a true, full and complete heart, a true knower of God's Grace and Mercy. The words of Hafiz apply here:
"All your images of winter I see against your sky.
I understand the wounds that have not healed in you.
They exist because God and Love have yet to become real enough
to allow you to forgive the dream."
The need to be loved and respected manifests as addiction. It is disrespectful disrespect and the quest for power.
The quest for power manifests as disrespect and the need to be respected.
The need for respect is not respect. It is disrespect and disrespectful. It is disrepectful of God and other. It respects only its vison of authority.
Denial gets us nowhere. The quest for power only disappears when recognized.
The quest for power will never give itself up willingly. Even if disclosed, it will seek to hide itself in its self justification.
The quest for power will only surrender to and for a greater power, and even then must be tricked into it. So the promising of worldly benefits, like the relief of pain and suffering, and success and the fulfillment of desires, becomes a useful means to encourage the real surrender, which is of course necessary for true success. Little does the fearful power seeker know that once having fallen into the trap of the love of surrender, his desires will be annihilated and only then he will realize his heart's true desire. Once free of the quest for power he will discover his true power, but like the accomplished Zen swordsman, will find that he no longer has need of it.
The quest for power is based on self-denial. But the power belongs to the denied.
Great Sufis have said of the quest for power that if you do not do the (healing) work of the Sufis (tasawwuf - purification/release of the soul through self disclosure/disolution) you will die while remaining in obstinate insistence on unforgivable sin, having never tasted the fruit of true surrender.
So realize, o seeker, that if you are building the dream of another you are not focusing on the building of your own, and therefore self-sacrificing and necessarily half-hearted. Don't Deny it!
Don't deny your nafs - Investigate the truth in everything.
Rabbi Haqqa, Ahli Haqqa, Nafsi Haqqa.
To your Lord His rights, to your family their rights, and to you self its rights.
Recognize your TrueSelf! Then Choose.
The quest for power or escape is the mind's response to not wanting to feel pain or emotions. And Dhikrullah is God's answer to that quest. Starting with astaghfirullah 100 times, we then bless the prophet and his family 100 times and then chant lailaha illallah endlessly until the joy of life returns. "Fa Dhikrullah, huwa shifa`u" - for Dhikrullah is the healing.
Astaghfirullah is for you, so that you will know in the root of your being exactly what you are doing. You are seeking the forgiveness of the divine and holy because of all that you have done that has caused you to feel the pain of separation. This is so you will know this and feel the changing effect of doing it from not having done it. "I am seeking the forgiveness of Allah", is the message we are telling ourselves with this repetition. And it should be repeated until received, but at least 100 times to be sure.
Then we send blessing on the holy prophet and his family. "Allahumma, salli `ala Sayyidina Muhammadin wa aalihi wa sallim" and this is to heal the wounds of separation from humanity; the relationship of our souls other souls. We can all come together and learn how to relate to one another around this.
Then lailaha illallah 100 times. Repeat the entire process until joyous and blissful. Don't stop until you have reached your goal. Then don't stop.