On The Need for Love, the Search for Authority
and the Nature and Power of Vested Interest
We do not question Authority because of our love for it.
And we love it so much because of the safety it seems to hold. And why is this? Because of the insecurity we seem to hold, and we wish to create an illusion to override the truth. And what is the truth? That we are extremely insecure and afraid to tolerate it. We will not tolerate it even for a second and immediately set about our mission to "create" security.
We fear insecurity rather than revel in it. Is a little child any more secure? Are they even aware that the world is not a safe place? From where did we learn this? And are we dedicated to teaching our children about our own insecurity? We worship power but not the Powerful. We seek the mote yet have not removed the beam.
We seek our salvation in another. This is blatant parentalism, and this because we assume ourselves guilty of something and will not give ourselves the credit of self absolution. Yet such is the nature of the forgiveness we seek.
Lessons in Futility: What keeps us from learning the new if not prejudice? What keeps us in prejudice if not vested interest and desire?
Be Secure in insecurity! Accept insecurity and hopelessness. Don't fight. Stop struggling and all will come to you with ease.
We are the Masters of Insecurity and Hopelessness.
Choose Enlightenment -
Become Enlightened First, Then Solve Your Problems
Conditional love imposes conditions for love. We then believe that all success is based on meeting conditions, so we seek to meet the conditions and in so doing forget and lose track of what we really seek.
We only really learn something when we have fully applied it to ourselves.
The danger of authoritarianism is in our love for it, and it's undeniable that people love, need and desire it, otherwise it wouldn't exist and wouldn't be observable for the danger it is.
Let me disillusion you.
For the people in need of the authoritarian father figure of perfection there can be some easy and serious disillusionment. Real masters establish the disillusionment first, simply so that the seeker will not put anyone on any pedestal at all, and are ensuingly rejected by students more dedicated to the search for a father figure or love interest than a real teacher.
Promises cause expectation. They also cause the feeling of absence. If I promise you you'll get something, you become immediately acutely aware of its absence. But supposing its something that you really do not need, but in promising it to you I'm also establishing or attempting to establish within you the sense of need for it. Simple Marketing 101. But all we really need is God; therefore we don't need God, because God is not somewhere to be needed, nor to be promised. So if we promise love, we create the absence and expectancy of it, and the need.
But it's not true. It's only an illusion.
"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all of the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. It is not necessary to seek for what is true but it is necessary to seek for what is false. Every illusion is one of fear, whatever form it takes. And the attempt to escape from one illusion into another must fail. If you seek love outside yourself you can be certain that you perceive hatred within, and are afraid of it. Yet peace will never come from the illusion of love, but only from its reality." ACIM - T-16.IV.6.
The Selfish Nature of Like and Dislike
It's my experience that we can like or even love someone based on the hope that that someone is the "one" we're looking for, or the one who can give us what we're looking for.
The Expectation of Payback and the Nature and Power of Vested Interest - When we invest interest in a path, we expect payback. That's why we invest in anything, with the expectation of payback. We want out of it at least what we put into it or more. So the expectation of payback becomes a desire based upon an unidentified or incorrectly identified need, and the payback is vested with the power of satisfying that need. So our desire, or need for payback, becomes the idol before which we lay further offerings in an increasingly vain hope, and we become powerless and helpless at the feet of our ideal (idol).
The Feeling of Authority
How nice would it be if we could enter into a path or course of study as teachers (with the feeling that we know it already and are only there to remind and be reminded) rather than as students (scratching our heads wondering what we're going to learn and why we need it)?
It's often simply that feeling of knowing what we're talking about that we seek - the feeling or experience of expertise that gives us the confidence we need in order to feel ok about ourselves. It's often simply that feeling of un-ok-ness (dis-ease) that drives us to seek the authority of expertise as a substitute.
Ego is a substitute for (ersatz) soul. Accept no substitutes. Have you settled for a substitute? Have I? Do I?
The Missing Link
And this is a path well worthy of vested interest. You will get back what you put into it and more, but an important and missing part of that path is taking the time to stop and reevaluate your position on it, your relationship to it, the benefits you've received from it, and to what degree you feel you need to invest further in it. After all, paths have a beginning and an end. We do not want to become professional students, do we?
Or do you? How will you know when and if you've reached the end? The prophet said, and it applies to all taliban (students) that (paraphrasing the hadith) "by the overzealous student (that's a drive, by the way, and by drive I mean a curable pathology) my back has been broken." In other words by not getting the point of the path or of any course of study (due to aforementioned personal unresolved agendas) the students stay in student mode and clog up the process with the weight of their own bodies and by the heaviness of their unwillingness to graduate and become part of the solution and no longer part of the problem.
And why do they do this? Because they're not getting what they're looking for and want - satisfaction.
The process then becomes stopped; and other students are led to believe the same and their progress becomes governed by the empowered governing faction that has by now taken over the definition of the system.
So it becomes a path for the sake of the path and for the sake of the people in it and no longer for Allah and the original purposes intended. If the students define the purpose of the path, it naturally benefits them in their partially enlightened state to define it as what they themselves are doing. Even and especially if they define it as the master defines it, because that makes them the masters of the definition, but not necessarily of its reality. How then can new people get beyond them? They then become the idols before which the new must bow for acceptance, when acceptance is only their own personal issue and not the goal at all!
Let's ask it like this -
Can we get to a point on the path where we recognize that there is a point to the path?
It's a question. Pay close attention!
Can we get to a point on the path where we recognize that there is a point to the path?
Exercise: Intentional Contemplation - Deliberation
I'm not asking you to actually get the point (yet) if you do not yet even get that there is a point. Just simply work on the idea of getting to a point where you can accept and recognize that there is a point. And don't define it, and don't even try to define it. Just investigate any and all of your objections to the idea of recognizing that there is an actual point to the path. Only if you can accept that there is actually a point to the path can we begin to consider what that point might be, and it's only by understanding what that point might be that we can actually get it. No, that's not entirely true. some get it by accident, if there is such a thing, but most - by direct deliberation. So if we're serious, let's deliberate. Let's make deliberated and deliberate intention to know God. Intentional Contemplation - Deliberation. How can we get it without understanding it, and how can we understand it without getting it? But none of that works if we do not accept that there is one.
Iqan: what are we really certain of?
Until we totally burn the self blaming nafsil lawamma we will never really be free of it. We can experience freedom, we can experience faith, illumination, enlightenment, but need we always be plagued with self-doubt and self reproach? Just make one or more little mistake and see then how well you carry yourself. Where does your pride and confidence go? Right down the drain, no?
So how do we handle this problem? Like we handle all problems, by embracing it. And not just by embracing the problem but by embracing the components of the problem. Embracing that problem is of course necessary but it's the first step and not the completion. Often we think we're 'embracing' a problem when we're only 'grabbing' it to put it on the 'to do later' shelf.